Thanks Mom & Maggie..

..for politely telling me to get over it. :) I'm in better spirits today. I just got back from lunch and all is well.

I just tried this new yogurt because I had a coupon.. Dannon Light & Fit 0% Plus Strawberry Yogurt. Normally, I get Yoplait.. but it's expensive. But this was really good! It was 60 calories and 0 fat for one cup. It has nice chunks of strawberries--almost like a dessert.

Okay, well that's all of my enlightening news for now. I'll check in soon!

Friday

I weighed in this morning.. I'm down another 1.4 lbs. So total so far that's 9.4 lbs. lost. I'm not really in a cheerful, posting mood.. But I promised an update.

Ya know, I wasn't going to elaborate but this is MY blog so I can do whatever I want, I guess. :) I'm just feeling kind of stressed out and worn down. The semester is coming to a close and I've had so much homework lately. I've been waking up with really bad headaches every morning.. Probably because I haven't been getting enough sleep at night. I know I should go to bed earlier.. But I'm staying up to do homework! It's a vicious cycle.. I'm having a hard time fitting everything in.

Anyway, that's all for now.

Update: As much as I wanted to stuff my face with fries... I had a stupid salad with grilled chicken for lunch. I guess I'm so used to using food as a way to relieve stress... And now that I can't do that.. I have nowhere for the stress to go! I have too much on my plate.. And sadly, not in the food sense.

Two things..

First of all.. I'm sooo excited that Ali won The Biggest Loser! She's the first woman to ever win the show. Yay, Ali! She gives me hope! That girl lost like over 47% of her total body weight. If she can do it, I can too. :)

Secondly, I registered with the Glamour website for their Body by Glamour program. I've seen them talk about it in the magazine forever, so I decided to join. It lets you track your progress and log meals and workouts. There are food and workout plans to choose from if you want. I've never really been a calorie counter, but it's worth a shot. You can calculate your BMI and see where you need to be. There seem to be a lot of tools all in one place. Plus, it's free. Can't beat that. So I figured I'd try it for a couple weeks. It also has a feature where you can be "buddies" with other people on Body by Glamour. You can send messages to eachother and track each other's progress. If anyone is already doing this or plans to, let me know! I need all the help I can get!

Well, tomorrow's weigh in day.... I promise to post no matter what! I *think* I was down 4 lbs. since my 3 lb. gain after Vegas. So that would make it total 7 lbs. lost?? I don't know. See, this is why I need to use that tracker thing. I'll check in tomorrow! :)

The good, the bad, and the ugly.

Maggie asked me why I haven't posted lately, so here I am. I believe there was a "missy" somewhere in that email too. I haven't posted because I haven't done very well the last week. If I'm AWOL, that's usually a good indicator that I'm not doing what I'm supposed to be. Honestly, I didn't even weigh myself Friday. I was under the somewhat delusional impression that no news is good news.

Battling your weight is such a struggle. I think that even if/when I'm skinny, it will still be a constant battle. It's like an eating disorder. I don't think you're ever "cured", you just learn how to deal with it better. I don't have that thing in my brain that tells me to stop eating after one serving like a normal person would.

I had the best of intentions this week, I really did. I'd start the day out with Special K and skim milk and an apple or orange. Then for lunch I brought a Lean Cuisine to work and maybe had another piece of fruit & yogurt. I drink water throughout the day. And if I have a Diet Coke at all, I try to limit it to one. And then I get home from work and start snacking like there's no tomorrow. My dad cooks healthy dinners, so that's always fine. But I just start snacking like crazy when I'm home and no one is watching. I don't know what my deal is. Maybe I need to have a snack after lunch @ work so I'm not starving by the time I get home. Because I get home at like 4:30 but I know dinner won't be ready until around 6:30 and I'd be dying by then. Any suggestions are welcome.

So today my dad calls me and says he's working late after all and I'll have to fend for myself for dinner. I went to Kroger on my way home from work. I was already tired and annoyed because I had to stay late. Shopping while you're exhausted and hungry is such a bad idea. I decided to buy one of those frozen Bertolli dinners because they're good and I had a coupon. Plus, I first saw them on an episode of Top Chef with Rocco Dispirito and I think he's hot. The winning contestant's dinner is actually sold by Bertolli now. So anyway.. the pasta made me think of Rocco and that cheered me up a little. (More on Rocco to come.)

I think when you shop while weary you buy things you wouldn't normally because you just want to get out of there. So I get to the checkout and my cart consists of: 1 Bertolli Mediterranean Garlic Shrimp Penne frozen dinner (340 calories and 11g of fat for half the bag. Not horrible.), a quart of skim milk for my cereal tomorrow, romaine lettuce, three different kinds of cheese, and a bottle of Arbor Mist. It crossed my mind that the cashier might consider me to be some kind of dairy crazed lush. But I wanted a little cheese for my salad and couldn't decide which kind. In my drained mental state, I just grabbed them all. I know cheese products will not go to waste in this household.

This is a little off topic, but I actually have quite a history with cheese. In preparation for our high school career day, they gave us a list of professions and told us to circle the three that interested us most. First, I chose acting because I really was interested in it at the time. The other two choices I made to be a smart alec.. "Porcelain Casting" and "Cheese Making". Little did I know that by "porcelain" they actually meant TOILETS. I had to listen to a guy explain how he makes his "commodes" for half an hour. Seriously, who let that kid sign his dad up? Then I moved on to cheese making. This consisted of sitting by myself in a dark back room in the library and watching a slide show on the glory of cheese making. Apparently, there were no kids with parents who were resident cheese makers at the time. So yeah, me and cheese go way back.

Now back to Rocco. He is such a cutie: I also like him because he recently lost weight himself and has made two appearances on The Biggest Loser this season. I love The Biggest Loser! Go Ali! :) Sometimes I wish I could sign up myself and let Bob just kick my butt and take the guess work out of it all.

Well, I guess that's about all for now. If y'all notice I'm not posting... Harass me about it until I do. I'm off to choose between various cheeses... Here's to getting back on track.