Cleaning Out My Closet

Okay, lately my clothes have started to look ridiculous on me. They're just baggy in the wrong places. I look like a hobo. I know, I know.. To have such problems! But I just felt like instead of feeling better about myself as I lose weight, I feel worse about my appearance because I look like a slob.

Almost two months ago, I tried on some clothes in my closet that I was hoping I'd fit into again. No luck. I have been afraid of that happening again, so I haven't touched them in a couple months. But last night I got up the courage to try some of them on again.

I discovered two pairs of badly needed jeans that fit again and a few tops. I found 3 pairs of Old Navy Jeans (Two are brand new with tags!) that ALMOST fit. Soon, I think. I will blame that on Old Navy's sizes running a tad small. And I found 3 pairs of jean capris that almost fit. Hopefully, they will fit this summer! I tried on lots of old tops that either fit or are too big. I found tons of things still with tags on them. It's crazy! I think I'd buy things that almost fit thinking it would motivate me to lose weight.. And then clearly, I never did.

But another thing that surprised me was that I have so many clothes that I've been holding on to for 9 or 10 years!! It was neat to see some of my old standbys.. But on the other hand, some of it was so outdated or raggedy I was like.. WHY do I still have this?! I had clothes from high school in there. Clothes that were over 5 years old, still with the tags on them. It's like it was comforting to just HAVE them or something? Maybe it comes from feeling like I don't fit into anything and don't have anything to wear... But having a full closet made me feel better? Even if those things didn't actually fit.. It's like I had choices.

My closet is filled to the brim. The section of clothes I actually wear is FAR smaller than the ones I do not. Not to mention the shelf up high that I can't even reach with my T-Rex arms. If you have been banished to that shelf.. It's a safe bet you don't get worn regularly. I only tried on like a third of the old things in there.. (I will need a chair to reach the rest!) But already I can tell that I will be getting rid of A LOT of things. Probably half my closet! It's quite liberating. I feel like I'm shedding the old me.

Oh, one highlight - Before winter, I tried on an old jacket I've had FOREVER and it did not fit. I couldn't zip it up. It's blue with aqua blue stripes up the sleeves. I've had it since... Ohhh.. Circa 2001? Probably in every picture of me from 2001-2006, I am wearing that jacket. So I tried it on last night thinking it still wouldn't fit.. But lo and behold, it zipped up with no problem! I am getting rid of probably everything else from that era... But I think I have to keep my beloved jacket. I will actually wear it again. :)

I still want to go shopping - Maybe Monday with the sales! But I want to bring in some new things that I can wear as I lose weight and get rid of a lot of old things. Note to my readers: You are being cruel to yourself if you keep an entire closet full of too small clothes, hoping you'll fit into them again one day! Ditch them! You're torturing yourself every time you open those doors! The same goes with huge clothes you've outgrown. For goodness sake, get rid of them! Do a little shopping and you will feel better about yourself.

You'll be happy to know that today I'm wearing a "new" shirt & jeans that fit again. :) And I put the stack of all those jeans in the middle of my room as motivation since I'm actually losing weight now and not hoping I'll lose weight. I think I'm going to break the 3-0 barrier on Friday! We'll see. :)